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Sept 17, 2019 4:43:32 GMT
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Post by Trix on Feb 14, 2018 3:51:00 GMT
250 Words
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All You Have Is Your Fire
don't you ever tame your demons
Layla had already had one doctor appointment to confirm that she was in fact pregnant and to determine how far along she was. At that point she had only been a few weeks, and they'd had her schedule her six week sonogram appointment that day. It was awkward having someone talk about this life that she was carrying inside of her and discussing the way that things would progress. She had no idea what most of it meant or what she'd need to do between each appointment, but that was what she had Patch's mom for, thankfully.
His mom had been busy on the day of the appointment, well, that or she wanted Patch to be the one with her this time around alone. Walking into the clinic, she had a vice grip on Patch's hand. Hospitals had always freaked her out as it was, after Lucas' death she'd stayed as far away from them as possible. And now, it took everything inside of her not to throw up at the sterile smell of it all. She curled around his arm and chewed on the inside of her cheek as her eyes wandered around the room.
Once they were led back to the room, Layla's eyes lifted to Patch and she took a deep breath, "I hate these things. I hate hospitals."
but always keep them on a leash
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962 posts
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Authored by
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Sept 19, 2019 9:40:59 GMT
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Post by Nu on Feb 14, 2018 4:26:39 GMT
286 Words
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it only takes a spark
to tear the world apart
Patch didn't want to go to the hospital with Layla for her first ultrasound because he was scared. Plain and simple. He knew his mother was more than capable of bringing Layla on her own and he even reasoned with himself that Layla wouldn't have wanted him to go.
But this second ultrasound, his mother had told him some bullshit story about being needed elsewhere and he couldn't argue with her because, well, nobody actually argued with the Adams matriarch. So he drove himself and Layla to the hospital and when they arrived, Patch had second thoughts. Very big second thoughts that was only assuaged when Layla gripped his hand.
It was the only thing anchoring him to the ground as they walked through.
He wanted to be brave for her but it was proving difficult because his grandfather had lived his last days stuck in a hospital with tubes running through every exposed orifice he had and he hadn't been in one since then. But today wasn't about him, he realised this. It was for Layla. And he had to remind himself that the only reason they were there was for her health.
"I know." He said quietly, rubbing his thumb over her hand. Her reason behind hating the hospital was the same as his and he took comfort in that at least. "I'm here though. We're fine." He patted her arm with his free hand.
She was ushered to the bed and he held her hand as the nurse prepped the tools. "It's going to be a little cold but otherwise, it'll be fine. Are you ready?" She asked Layla with a gentle smile on her face.
Patch squeezed Layla's hand and nodded reassuringly.
i'll shine a light on you
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944 posts
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Sept 17, 2019 4:43:32 GMT
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Post by Trix on Feb 14, 2018 4:42:29 GMT
255 Words
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All You Have Is Your Fire
don't you ever tame your demons
Her eyes stayed fixated on his face and she took comfort in the way they could at least relate in their general hatred for hospitals. She liked having him there, much as she knew how uncomfortable he was. It made her feel less awkward because even though she'd known his parents forever and they were more like parents to her than her own, she couldn't help feeling like a burden to them. At least with Patch, she knew that he took her burdens the way she'd take any of his. They were best friends and they did everything for each other.
Once she was laying on the bed, her breathing started to pick up and she squeezed his hand tighter. The fact that it was going to be cold wasn't what worried her, it was everything else. She didn't know what to feel, but she was panicked. Layla took a deep breath and closed her eyes, giving a small nod to signal that she was kind of ready. Her teeth sank into her lip as the nurse brought up the ultrasound on the small screen beside them.
When it was finally on the screen, Layla opened her eyes and looked at Patch, her eyes remaining on him rather than the screen. She didn't want to see it. It wasn't hers and she didn't want to see it.
but always keep them on a leash
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962 posts
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Sept 19, 2019 9:40:59 GMT
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Post by Nu on Feb 14, 2018 5:16:01 GMT
124 Words
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it only takes a spark
to tear the world apart
The nurse pressed the ultrasound wand against Layla's lower abdomen and slid it across and Patch's eyes went to the screen. It was all way too fuzzy and he didn't actually know what he was looking at until the nurse started showing what everything was.
The emotions running through Patch were undeniably strong and even though the baby growing in Layla wasn't his, he suddenly felt attached to it when he saw the heartbeat on the screen.
His own heart quickened as his eyes moved down to Layla with a small smile. "Dude...the kid's alive in there." He whispered.
"Okay, we're going to listen to the fetus' heartbeat now but would you like a printout of the sonogram today?" The nurse asked Layla.
i'll shine a light on you
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944 posts
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Sept 17, 2019 4:43:32 GMT
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Post by Trix on Feb 14, 2018 5:24:59 GMT
179 Words
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All You Have Is Your Fire
don't you ever tame your demons
The reaction from Patch was unexpected and harder to accept than the smiles from the nurse. She didn't think he'd be so happy to see it. Not with it being Riley's. She'd expected indifference or something that she could use to keep her own emotions in check. It almost made her want to scream or cry or both. It wasn't a kid, it wasn't her kid. She couldn't look at it.
When the nurse asked if she wanted a printout, Layla shook her head rapidly, "No. Can we just speed this up?" All she could focus on was whether it was healthy because she needed to be able to give it away after all of this. And the longer it remained on the screen, she feared, the more Patch would get attached to it.
Layla looked away from him and settled for the ceiling instead. It, at least, wouldn't betray her.
but always keep them on a leash
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Sept 19, 2019 9:40:59 GMT
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Post by Nu on Feb 14, 2018 5:39:33 GMT
163 Words
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it only takes a spark
to tear the world apart
Patch's heart squeezed in itself when Layla looked away from him after refusing the printout. He looked at the nurse who was looking at him with a sympathetic smile. "Print it out for me please." He mouthed to which the nurse gave a gentle smile and nodded.
"Another cold one I'm afraid." The nurse warned Layla as she applied the gel to another wand before pressing it against Layla's stomach, moving it around until the sound finally came. Patch looked at the nurse and then at Layla, squeezing her hand as his own heartbeat quickened.
There was no way he wasn't getting attached to this baby already and this was the last straw. He bit his lower lip as the sound became clearer until the heartbeat was the only thing he could hear.
He knew he wasn't the father and he knew Layla wasn't going to keep it but just the sound of their heartbeat was enough to keep his shadows at bay.
i'll shine a light on you
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944 posts
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Sept 17, 2019 4:43:32 GMT
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Post by Trix on Feb 14, 2018 5:54:39 GMT
263 Words
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All You Have Is Your Fire
don't you ever tame your demons
She bit down harder on her lip when the cold wand pressed to her stomach and she tightened her grip on his hand in response as well. Still, her eyes remained on the ceiling. At first it was muffled and she couldn't really hear it, she could just hear Patch's breathing above her and the small beeps and sounds from the machines. Maybe it was because that was what she'd rather focus on than what they were looking for.
When the sound started becoming louder and clearer through the machine, Layla could feel her heart expand painfully and her lip started trembling beneath her teeth. Her eyes slipped shut to keep tears from escaping. She wasn't going to cry in front of the nurse. She couldn't keep it. The thought just kept repeating in her head that it wasn't hers. It wasn't meant for her. It was just her mistake.
But it echoed in her ears and Layla eventually couldn't hear her own thoughts. She just heard its little heart beating frantically. Like a little hummingbird. Her fingers squeezed Patch's harder and she shook her head, not opening her eyes. She couldn't do this anymore. She couldn't pretend like she didn't want it. And she couldn't pretend that she didn't already love it with everything that she possessed, even though she'd been trying so hard to act like she wanted nothing to do with it.
but always keep them on a leash
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962 posts
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Sept 19, 2019 9:40:59 GMT
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Post by Nu on Feb 14, 2018 6:23:48 GMT
94 Words
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it only takes a spark
to tear the world apart
For a brief moment, Patch was lost in the sound of the heartbeat that he didn't realise Layla was even in the room. That was until she squeezed his hand and he looked down to see the tears rolling from her closed eyes.
He grabbed the chair closest to him and sat down so that he could be level with her. He pulled her hand to his lips and kissed it as his other hand moved to her forehead. "Layla...it's fine...the kid's fine..." He said, not knowing exactly why she was crying.
i'll shine a light on you
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Sept 17, 2019 4:43:32 GMT
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Post by Trix on Feb 14, 2018 6:35:03 GMT
238 Words
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All You Have Is Your Fire
don't you ever tame your demons
The tears only pushed out of her eyes harder when Patch pressed his lips to her hand and tried to ease her mind. He didn't understand, and she didn't know how to make him understand. She assumed based on the intensity of the moment, the nurse gave them a moment to talk because after wiping the gel from her stomach, Layla opened her eyes to the nurse closing the door behind her.
Her free hand went immediately to her stomach and she could tell that her fingers were trembling against her skin. "It's not mine, I can't keep it, Patch. I can't do it," She whispered through her tears. "But I want to. I don't want to give it away anymore," Saying the words out loud was harder because she knew it wasn't the right thing to do. It was the selfish thing to do.
But she loved it and she loved that Patch loved it, too. It was more than she could have ever said about her own parents. She almost believed that she could be happy raising it as hers, like she could stop herself from making the mistakes her parents did. Her fingers traced against the side of her stomach and she sniffled, "I don't want to give it away."
but always keep them on a leash
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962 posts
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Authored by
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Sept 19, 2019 9:40:59 GMT
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Post by Nu on Feb 14, 2018 6:47:18 GMT
74 Words
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it only takes a spark
to tear the world apart
When she finally spoke, Patch listened and he felt the little spark of hope bloom in his chest when the implication behind her words were made clear to him. He didn't say anything and let her make her own conclusion.
And when she did, he pulled her into a hug. "We'll make it work." He said and that was all he said as he continued to hug her, kissing the top of her head.
i'll shine a light on you
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Sept 17, 2019 4:43:32 GMT
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Post by Trix on Feb 14, 2018 16:06:51 GMT
186 Words
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All You Have Is Your Fire
don't you ever tame your demons
As he pulled her close, Layla wrapped her arms around him and buried her face in his shoulder. She could tell that he was relieved, just as she knew he would be. It had been written on his face since the moment she told him that he wanted her to keep it. Because it was half her. He didn't care that Riley had been the sperm donor or that she was a mess. The faith that he had in her abilities was sickening to her because she couldn't have the same faith in herself.
She nodded against his shoulder and squeezed him tighter.
Layla chewed on her lower lip and dropped one of her arms so that she could put her hand back on her stomach. It was proving to be sort of comforting, like a miniature lifeline was just under her skin. "Your parents won't be mad will they? That I changed my mind?" She asked quietly.
but always keep them on a leash
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Authored by
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Sept 19, 2019 9:40:59 GMT
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Post by Nu on Feb 14, 2018 17:14:38 GMT
160 Words
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it only takes a spark
to tear the world apart
Stroking her hair, Patch pressed his lips on the top of her head once more and left it there, sighing at how relieved he really was. He would have supported her if she really decided to give the baby away but knowing she was keeping it was also a comfort.
Her question made the shadow manipulator snort. "In their mind, they adopted you the moment you stepped into the house. They're never gonna get a grandkid from me so this one is going to be their little miracle no matter what you decide to do." He responded with a grin as he let her go, but stayed close.
He looked down at her and smiled, wiping away her tears with his t-shirt. "I think the only thing you have to worry about is mom smothering you until you give birth. Like she will be a hybrid of Dr. Phil, Oz and Oprah 24/7. I'm warning you now." He chuckled.
i'll shine a light on you
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Sept 17, 2019 4:43:32 GMT
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Post by Trix on Feb 14, 2018 18:49:34 GMT
217 Words
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All You Have Is Your Fire
don't you ever tame your demons
Layla tapped her finger against his chest and frowned. It wasn't like she planned on having kids at this point either, but the way Patch wanted a mini her, she wanted a mini him. If he didn't have kids, she couldn't be the cool aunt-type-thing. Although, she supposed it wasn't completely up to him either because he wouldn't be having it. She sighed, "I'm glad that you think they'll be cool with it. At least this kid is gonna be loved to bits by one set of grandparents." Her own would be lucky if they ever saw the baby.
When he wiped her tears away she kept her eyes on his face and found herself smiling at the picture of his mom smothering her. She'd never been smothered before, except in the sense of being suppressed from the world. If it wasn't for that, her parents never would have paid her any mind. "You say that like it's a bad thing."
Layla looked down at her stomach and her eyebrows pulled together, "I have to say, I'm not looking forward to the bump. It's gonna make me top heavy."
but always keep them on a leash
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962 posts
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Authored by
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Sept 19, 2019 9:40:59 GMT
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Post by Nu on Feb 14, 2018 20:03:42 GMT
100 Words
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it only takes a spark
to tear the world apart
Patch stroked Layla's hair when she mentioned her parents. It always hurt him whenever he realised she didn't get even half the love he got from his parents. It was the reason why his parents showered her with it whenever she was around. His parents sensed these things, he never understood how.
"Oh baby...you say that now." He chuckled and pressed his lips against her forehead before looking down at her stomach with a grin. His eyes moved to her chest with a raised eyebrow. "Would be an improvement though." He poked the side of one breast and snorted.
i'll shine a light on you
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Sept 17, 2019 4:43:32 GMT
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Post by Trix on Feb 14, 2018 20:18:50 GMT
167 Words
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All You Have Is Your Fire
don't you ever tame your demons
When he kissed her forehead, she smiled and reached up to pat his cheek, "You're just jealous she won't be smothering you anymore. You know we're both going to be SOL when it's born. She won't be smothering either of us then." And she'd have to share her time with Patch, too, neither of which she was looking forward to. She already worried that the baby would favor him over her.
Her hand swatted at his and she smacked his arm, "Shut up, ass. It's not like you get to see 'em anyway. They're gonna get all big and hot, only to be used for mothering purposes. How sucky is that?" She looked at her chest and shrugged, "Ah well, they'll be fun to look at while I'm showering at least." Her eyes lifted to Patch's and she smirked.
but always keep them on a leash
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